DS Review: Marker Man Adventures

It's not too often that I encounter a game that's so terrible, I can't even play it. Even with skullnumbingly boring titles, I'll usually sit through it and stick it out for the duration of the game to give it a fair shot. Most bad games usually still have some redeeming factor. But then, there's others like this one that I can't even say that about.

On the heels of Drawn To Life, this seemed like an intriguing concept. But here's the problem: You're dropped directly into the game with NO tutorial or even a clue of how to play whatsoever. Through trial and error, you'll find that you're able to jump, and that you can draw basic shapes of circles, squares, triangles, rectangles, and straight lines in which to aid your navigation (which could be considered "unpredictable" on a mild day, at best) throughout the world. For each shape drawn, however, it draws away from your health points, as do the usual hazards such as running into enemies, falling on spikes, etc. You can erase what you've drawn for extra health, but it will use up your markers, which are too few and far between to depend on. So, how exactly DO you play this? Who knows! I searched high and low on Google for walkthroughs, tips, ANYTHING... and apparently everyone's come to the same conclusion: this game is virtually unplayable. What a waste. Should you be skilled enough even to progress past the first level somehow? That's okay - you won't make it far. See, this game is set up like the old NES games... If you die, you aren't returned to the same spot, or even the beginning of the level. Oh, no... You're returned to the start of the GAME. And with the navigation being as iffy as it is? It doesn't matter how many times you play it through. It doesn't make it any easier. Much of the problem lies in the fact that about 9 times out of 10, your shapes and lines will not register. You can sit there and draw them over and over for god knows how long before it'll finally show up. If you're lucky, it'll be the shape you were trying for. Chances are, it won't be.

The concept of this game was good, but in execution, it fails. Hard. Giving it a 1 out of 10 stick figure men.